| Anger | Autism | Confusion | Depression |
| Exercise | Fear | Mental Health | Physical Health |
| Shame | Sleep | Stress | Supporting A Loved One |
Standing alongside someone in the criminal justice system is tough. You may be juggling work, family, money worries and your own emotions while trying to keep track of letters, dates and decisions. Good support is steady, practical and kind, but it also protects your energy and boundaries so you can keep going for the long haul.
Start by agreeing how you will help. Ask what they need most this week and be specific about what you can do. That might be lifts to appointments, sitting in on calls and taking notes, helping with forms, or simply being there after difficult news. Keep plans simple and write them down so nobody is guessing. A short check-in message before a hearing, a reminder the night before a probation appointment, or a call after an unpaid work session can make a big difference.
Keep information in one place. A single notebook or shared digital note helps you both stay on the same page. Write who you spoke to, what was agreed and any deadlines. If the conversation moves fast, ask for key points in writing. For court dates, reporting times, licence conditions, probation requirements, unpaid work instructions, fines and payment plans, make sure the details are clear and easy to find. When emotions run high, reliable notes stop confusion and arguments.
Protect your relationship during stressful moments. Heavy days can spill into sharp words. Decide in advance how you will pause and reset if things get heated. A short walk, a glass of water and ten slow breaths give everyone a chance to cool down. Keep big conversations for calmer times and avoid late-night debates when people are exhausted. If you disagree about a decision, bring it back to the facts, the next sensible step and what is actually within their control.
Be careful on social media. Posting about a live case can cause real harm. Screenshots travel quickly and may be used out of context. Encourage private, measured communication with professionals rather than public posts or group chats that inflame emotions. If the person you’re supporting is tempted to vent online, suggest drafting a message and sleeping on it. Most things look different in the morning.
Work well with professionals. Encourage your loved one to speak for themselves where they can, and support them to ask for plain English, written summaries, short breaks or a quieter space if meetings are overwhelming. If you attend, take notes, help them keep to the agenda and check understanding at the end. If you are worried about health, safety or understanding, say so, but avoid answering on their behalf unless asked. Respect confidentiality and the limits of what a solicitor, probation officer or prison staff can share.
Look after the basics for both of you. Regular meals, water, daylight, gentle movement and a set bedtime make the whole process easier to bear. Plan recovery time after hearings, prison visits or probation meetings so the day does not run from one stressful task to the next. If money is tight, explore simple travel plans in advance and pack snacks to avoid long, hungry waits.
Set boundaries you can keep. Supporting someone does not mean being available at every moment. Choose a time of day for case admin and keep the rest of the day for normal life. Say what you can’t do as clearly as what you can. If you feel resentment creeping in, it is a sign to scale back to something sustainable rather than pushing until you burn out.
Know when to bring in extra help. If your loved one is struggling with low mood, panic, anger or sleep, encourage them to speak to their GP and ask what local support is available. If risk rises — talk of self-harm, hopelessness, loss of control or immediate danger — act now. You can call Samaritans on 116 123 for confidential emotional support at any time, text SHOUT to 85258 for free 24/7 text support, or use NHS 111 for urgent mental health help. If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 999.
Remember that your steadiness matters. You are part of their support system, and you are also a person with your own needs. Keep your own routines, stay connected to people who lift you, and take small breaks that let your mind settle. Support is a marathon, not a sprint. Calm, consistent presence beats grand gestures.
If you have any questions then contact us using the link below.
This page gives general information only. It is not legal advice.